Working with the Bullied Child

Research has revealed common characteristics and profiles among students who are repeatedly bullied. One group is referred to as passive (a.k.a. submissive) victims, another as provocative victims. Clarifying the behaviors of a student who is repeatedly bullied can lead to strategies that reduce victimization.

Passive victims signal, through attitude and behaviors, that they are insecure and will not respond strongly if bullied. They are often:

-Physically weaker than others their age
-Afraid of being hurt, have poor physical coordination and don't do well in sports
-Have poor social skills and have difficulty making friends
-Are cautious, sensitive, quiet, withdrawn and shy
-Are anxious, insecure, and cry or become upset easily
-Have poor self-esteem
-Have difficulty standing up for or defending themselves, physically and verbally

Provocative victims express behaviors that often irritate others and incite negative reactions. They often:

-Have poor social skills -- appear to instigate the bullying
-Are hyperactive, restless, and have difficulty concentrating
-Are clumsy, immature, and exhibit irritating habits
-Do not develop strong friendships
-Are hot-tempered and attempt to fight back, ineffectively and sometimes entertainingly, when victimized
-Pick on smaller kids

If the bullied child has traits familiar to either list, altering their behavior may help reduce further bullying and develop self-esteem, resiliency and empowerment - qualities that will limit further victimization.For instance, teach passive victims to respond assertively to bullies with details that include specific language and how to express confident body language, eye contact, and tone of voice. These students will also need to practice social skills and learn activities appreciated by peers.

Provocative victims also need to learn age appropriate skills. They will need help from a caring adult to become aware of behaviors that generate negative reactions from others. They may also need help with emotional management techniques.

Social skills training should be incorporated into behavior plans, classroom lessons, and IEPs (Individualized Education Plans).

Although some behaviors do perpetuate bullying, no one ever deserves to be bullied!

For more information and other bully prevention strategies, contact Balance Educational Services 1-802-362-5448 © 2008 www.BalanceEducationalServices.com

What will I learn?

Learn fun and interactive lesson plans that teach pro-social behaviors and fulfill State education requirements.

Attendees will learn how to:

* Create a 'same page' understanding of bullying, social aggression and harassment throughout the school

* Teach all staff an easy 4-Step response to stop bullying quickly

* Implement consequences that replace bullying with pro-social behavior

* Teach targets of bullying how to stand up to a bully safely and effectively

* Teach student bystanders to stop others from bullying

* Recognize the dynamics of social aggression

* Apply practical strategies to confront social aggression and cyber bullying

What Students Need to Know About Cyber Bullying

Cyber bullying is intentional wrongdoing and the cyber bully can be held responsible by a court of law under the following circumstances:
-Publishing a false statement about another which is damaging to their reputation
-Publicly disclosing a private fact about another
-Breaking into someone's account
-Purposely causing someone emotional distress

The following actions may be considered criminal, regardless if it happens online or directly:
-Making threats of violence to people or their property
-Trying to force someone to do something he or she doesn't want to do
-Sending obscene or harassing text messages, emails, pictures, telephone calls, etc.
-Harassment or stalking
-Creating or sending sexually explicit images of teens (considered child pornography even if sent by another child)
-Taking a photo of someone in place where privacy is expected (locker room, bathroom, etc.)

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For more information and other bully prevention strategies, contact Balance Educational Services at 1-802-362-5448 info@BalanceEducationalServices.com

Is Your Staff Really Prepared To Stop Bullying???

"It is clear that, without intervention, bullying can lead to serious social, emotional, physical, academic, and legal problems for those involved. It is also clear that comprehensive efforts involving school staff, parents, students, and the broader community are likely to reduce and preavent bullying more effectively than a single, isolated approach. While studies of successful anti-bullying programs are somewhat scarce in the United States, evaluation data from other countries suggest that a comprehensive approach can change student attitudes and behaviors and increase adults' willingness to intervene. Although teachers, counselors, and parents may be able to deal with individual cases of bullying as they come up, such interventions are unlikely to have a significant impact on the incidence of bullying at school. Bullying often goes undetected by teachers, school staff, and parents. In fact, adults typically identify less than 10 percent of bullying incidents -- partly because bullying tends to occur in unsupervised areas and partly because many adults simply do not understand the dynamics of bullying. Adults throughout the school community -- including administrators, teachers, health personnel, bus drivers, and cafeteria workers -- require training on this important issue if they are to understand, recognize, and know how to deal with bullying.
The entire school, as well as the broader community, must further be involved in bullying prevention efforts in order to create a positive climate in which caring and considerate interactions thrive and aggressive actions are deemed unacceptable. Isolated prevention and intervention strategies do not alone allow for the promotion of norms against bullying. Young people require positive modeling, proactive instruction, and ongoing support if they are to make decisions and take actions in favor of potential victims and in opposition to potential aggressors." Exploring the Nature and Prevention of Bullying

When was the last time your staff received effective, high quality bullying prevention training? Call or email 1-802-362-5448 or info@BalanceEducationalServices.com to schedule a Fall '09 professional development presentation.

Teen Commits Suicide Due to Bullying: Parents Sue School for Son's Death

Eric Mohat, 17, was harassed so mercilessly in high school that when one bully said publicly in class, "Why don't you go home and shoot yourself, no one will miss you," he did.
In a federal lawsuit, the parents of Eric Mohat allege that their son committed suicide after being tormented by bullies at his Mentor, Ohio, High School. They say the school knew about the bullying and failed to protect their son.

Now his parents, William and Janis Mohat of Mentor, Ohio, have filed a lawsuit in federal court, saying that their son endured name-calling, teasing, constant pushing and shoving and hitting in front of school officials who should have protected him.
The lawsuit -- filed March 27, alleges that the quiet but likable boy, who was involved in theater and music, was called "gay," "fag," "queer" and "homo" and often in front of his teachers. Most of the harassment took place in math class and the teacher -- an athletic coach -- was accused of failing to protect the boy.
"When you lose a child like this it destroys you in ways you can't even describe," Eric Mohat's father told ABCNews.com.
The parents aren't seeking any compensation; rather, they are asking that Mentor High School recognize their son's death as a "bullicide" and put in place what they believe is a badly needed anti-bullying program.

By SUSAN DONALDSON JAMES ABC News

Is Your Camp Staff Really Prepared to Stop Bullying???

It's that time of year... when parents are preparing to send 10 million of their children to summer camp. 1 in 5 American kids will be away from home this summer, facing everything from bug bites to bullying in the cabin.
That's right. Bullying - from gossiping, name-calling, and shunning to punching, hitting, and physical intimidation - isn't reserved for the schoolyard. It's a growing problem for summer camp directors, camp counselors, and the parents of their campers.

There is something camps can do about bullying. Mike Dreiblatt uses interactive techniques - such as role-playing and lots of audience participation - to help camp counselors and staff find the most effective ways to recognize, prevent, and stop bullying from "day one".
Why is bullying important right now? With an increase in bullying awareness, parents are anxious about sending their kids far away from home. They know that bullying not only undermines a child's self-worth but also makes the target feel intimidated, threatened, unsupported, and unsafe (physically and emotionally).
With a downturn in the economy, parents are also weighing how they spend money. The result? Parents wonder whether it's worth footing a summer camp's hefty bill.
Here's the good news! Camps that offer bullying prevention training reassure worried parents and campers that they are able to nip the problem in the bud. When campers have safe and happy times away from home, they thrive. When the summer camping experience is positive, camp reputations are strengthened, enrollments increase, and existing campers return year after year.
Balance Educational Services, a Manchester Center, Vermont-based consulting and training company, has provided custom-designed student presentations, staff workshops, and parent workshops to school systems and summer camps across the country. Its goal is to teach people how to recognize and minimize bullying and other forms of anti-social behavior in children and supervising adults.

School Shooters Were Bullied

As we look back on the tenth anniversary of the Columbine High School tragedy, we need to remember that bullying was a major factor in over 40 school shootings that took place during the past decade. Bullying can also lead to suicide, severe depression and anxiety, truancy, and dropping-out of school. We need to find a way to stop bullying in schools and to refute assumptions that this behavior is normal.
We need to create communities in schools and raise awareness of all parties involved including victims, bullies, and bystanders so that school social hierarchies are dismantled and students treat each other with sincere appreciation and respect.
Evidence suggests strong school communities -- where kids feel like they can come forward with problems -- can prevent violent crime.
"The first and best line of defense is always a well-trained, highly alert staff and student body," said Kenneth Trump, president of National School Safety and Security Services, an Ohio-based firm specializing in school security.
"The No. 1 way we find out about weapons in schools is not from a piece of equipment [such as a metal detector] but from a kid who comes forward and reports it to an adult that he or she trusts."
A 2008 Secret Service report found that in more than 80 percent of instances of school violence, at least one person, usually a fellow student or peer, had knowledge of the attackers' plans. If people who suspect a problem feel comfortable enough in school to tell a teacher or a principal, then attacks could be prevented.
Make sure your staff receives effective, high quality bullying prevention training. Call or email 1-866-768-4803 or info@BalanceEducationalServices.com to schedule a Fall '09 professional development presentation. www.Balance EducationalServices.com

Contributors John D. Sutter,CNN Jessie Klein, www.huffingtonpost.com